Girls (and guys)...you know. Dating sucks. There are losers slinking out of every hidden corner, just waiting to buy you a drink before they let their freak flag fly proudly. These are my adventures in both traditional and on-line dating. Pull up a chair, laugh till you pee, and live vicariously through my loser-filled adventures. And please note...this blog is rated R for language and sexual content.

Friday, May 4, 2012

Dry spell

I'm finding myself in a bit of a dry spell recently.  On purpose.  I have no mood for dating.

Of course, saying I'm in no mood for dating is counter productive for a dating blog, so I did accept an invitation to dinner from the Russian Spy.  (And in doing a quick search on my blog for the Russian Spy date recap, I realize I failed to write about him, which means I have nothing time stamped and I'll probably end up making the date of the date - ha! - up.)

I do remember wearing a sweater and open toe shoes, so I'm guessing it was around early fall last year.  Let's just go with that, shall we?

He picked me up.  In our prior conversations, which lasted much longer than I usually allow due to his military travel schedule, I found out that he came to the US as a 16-year old with his family and immediately became a US Citizen.  After high school he joined the military and completed medical school and is currently a scientist for the Army, researching really bad stuff like infectious diseases and weapons of mass destruction. 

OK - that kinda sounds like a big turn off right there, but when he showed up to pick me up and I got in his tricked out car with the heated tushy seats and apologized for having to call his grandmother in my presence...then proceeded to have an entire conversation in the sexiest Russian I have ever heard...well, I was hooked.  Our date went so splendidly that evening that I was able to see my very first (and only) uncircumcised penis. 

We made plans for a second date to a very fancy place in town for the next weekend, which he then cancelled on me claiming he had to travel.  We spoke a couple of times afterwards, then I wrote him off because he really didn't have time for a relationship, or at least not the kind that I wanted.

He easily faded into the background. 

Just recently, he's resurfaced.  Not sure why.  But, he sent me a text asking how things were.  I told him about the new job I was starting and how I was nervous.  He very boldly said that he was going to take me out to celebrate.

Um...sure.

Then, he disappeared again, with moments of "I didn't forget about you" texts every couple of weeks. 

Our second date went into effect Friday night.  He once again picked me up and we once again went to the same bar we had our first date at.  Yawn!  I have got to mention one of my pet peeves - don't ask a girl out then NOT have a plan!  If you go so far as to ask me out and pick me up, please just make a plan to go somewhere YOU pick - and stop asking me where I would like to go.  I could care less where we go really...but I am interested to see what kind of effort you put in.

It then dawned on me that I may have been incredibly intoxicated that last time we went out, because 1. I thought the Russian Spy was hot, 2. I thought he was interesting and 3. I thought he had a full head of hair.  He basically spent the whole time telling me about all of the other dates he went on since the last time he saw me.  (Apparently he takes a liking to social workers - of which I am not.) 

I shit you not, I almost walked out of there...until I remembered that I didn't drive myself.  It also has made him crazy that I didn't invite him in, only gave him a goodbye kiss on the cheek and didn't respond to his first text the next day.  Instead of getting the hint that the chemistry wasn't there, he's trying harder.  That whole conversation is not one that I am looking forward to.

2 comments:

  1. Interesting post! I really love it.

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  2. Based from the story you shared it seems that you have a very experience in your date. If I were you, I will no longer allow that Russian spy communicate with me again. I can say that you don't like him because of his characteristic so why make it far?just tell him your true feelings for him and I'm sure he will accept it.
    The most disgusting part is that he told you his past dates which is kinda insulting to your part.

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